Thursday, March 11, 2010

My little heaven

Where do I even begin with this blog post anyway?

I feel kinda emotional since today's the day for SPM results..

and eventhough I've gotten really average results...I still feel pretty proud of myself...for doing it all on my own...with just one tuition =D....

However...sometimes I kinda feel like I have inferiority complex especially when all my other friends start talking about their results...to me they have already gotten perfectly wonderful SPM results..yet they are not satisfied....I guess if it was UEC I can kinda relate to that..but when it comes to SPM..I am having a total culture shock....Though many people have already told me not to bother about what people think or say..or how they view me..but I couldn't help but feel that somehow..I'm really stupid compared to them..like somehow...I don't have the brains to even ace SPM....

When I got to school today..people were comparing their results and not even ashamed to tell me that they've gotten 5Gs and stuff..some of them have even all the alphabets in the score tally....yet they are so carefree and can afford to laugh about it...but when it comes to college..the slightest mention of a B is enough to reduce a grown teenager into tears...( heck A- does the job pretty well also)....I guess I'm in the middle of both worlds...

On top of all this bullshit..I've got people crying to me about their relationship problems..and getting all depressed on me..

That's why this is truly my little heaven..at least here..I can be as emo as I want to....at least right here I can say it loudly and proudly...I love my spm results..back in college...if I say this out loud..guess I'll be viewed as a freako....

Sometimes..I wonder..was it worth it giving up hh for this...was it worth it not doing UEC for the sake of a levels..sometimes I think it is..sometimes I just wish I could just go back to that safe sheltered place of hh....


*facing 2mrw with a happy smile*


toodles


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