Where Did All The Time Go?

Right, I had actually started this post a million years ago, but couldn't finish it due to me being stressed and hormonal, likely to cry everytime I type SLR, so yeah , here it is again, edited and hopefully a true recollection of the best 6 months in college.

As I am typing this, I will be sitting for my last paper for finals on Wednesday (Biology 42), very soon in the very foreseeable future, I am going to finish my college education and head off the university, it sounds really scary, but it's just another part of life.

The few weeks leading up to the finals have been quite uneventful except that I have now became part of a group known as Study Lounge Regulars and have been camping out in the Study Lounge, (they have a group on facebook). I've realised the PITIFUL amount of past years I did last year, so now I'm making up for that. Given a chance I would've have started earlier, one of my many regrets.

Just like how I regretted WASTING ALL MY BLOODY TIME OVER SOME IDIOT, but that is old news now, and my blood still boils when I think about the last encounter I had with him, MY BLOOD BOILS SERIOUSLY! I've never ever felt so much anger and hatred for a person before. Now it's not the time for a full blown rant, but let's just say I've categorised whatever he said to me before the encounter as 'lies' and 'bullshit' now, because of the single sentence he told me, 'you were the one who was thinking too much and reading too much into my actions.' Regretted not doing anything more drastic in that restaurant, PRIDE , I'm sorry you had to reach rock bottom!

GIRLS- If a guy tells you that everything is due to your own misunderstanding, SLAP HIM LIKE NO TOMORROW!

GUYS- Don't ever say that. You wouldn't be with a girl or even spend time with her if you had no feelings for her.

So anyway, enough about that, haters got to hate and all,back to ranting about college.

I find it weird and oddly sad that I meet the most amazing people during the last few weeks of my semester. I wouldn't have thought that the study lounge is filled with the most eccentric, wonderful, kind hearted, cheerful, funny, people. I'm constantly thinking, wtf have I been doing all these while? then I realised that I've wasted it ALL on a douchebag, which gets me back into feeling oddly sad that I've met the most amazing etc etc people in the study lounge during the last few weeks of my semester, vicious cycle really now that I think about it, makes my heart die a little inside.

College was the place that I really learned a lot from , not just in term of academic stuff, but in terms of social relations and how to interact. My only wish was being able to meet those wonderful people before. Sometimes when they echo my feelings, I will jauntily say there is always facebook, truth to be told I feel a bit down when I know that after this few weeks and when college ends we really won't be seeing each other anymore, no matter how far technology has advanced, no matter how many social networking sites there are, nothing beats good old fashion face to face conversations and just generally being in each other's company. What is facebook compared to the times we spent mugging over a subject together? What is facebook compared to the times we did random stuff in the lounge? What is facebook compared to the endless conversations we have about our lives?

Facebook is nothing.

I'm am so emotional nao, I could just krai.

Sadly to say, I'll miss that stupid room and all the people in it, I'll miss bursting in the glass doors with my arms laden with books, hair all over the place, and whacking everyone with my super huge bag announcing my arrival with my zombie look. If there's a rewind button for college, I'll rewind it back to the beginning so I can meet these wonderful people earlier, and not fuckers like him.

This is probably not the time to be emo, but I most certainly am.

Hence, I'll end this saddening post now, before the water works start for real. Study Lounge you have thought me a lot, and I know that nothing can replace that wonderful group of people.

A levels, you're not so bad after all with the right company.

Love,

Jean :')